We regret to inform you that The Irish Lumberjack has been abducted by one of B. Hussein Obama's Truth Squads! He is currently being held in Room 101 at the Ministry of Love and being coerced into the following activities under threat of torture:
1. Watching Weather Underground recruiting films.
2. Chanting "the Constitution is a living, breathing document" over and over again.
3. Looking at nude pictures of Gloria Steinem.
4. Writing out fresh copies of "The Communist Manifesto" and "Rules for Radicals" by hand.
5. Watching a PBS special on the life of Margaret Mead.
6. Watching another PBS special about the courage of Rigoberta Menchu.
7. Being forced to do calisthenics wearing nothing but a latex condom and an extra small Che Guevara t-shirt.
8. Writing letters to the Wall Street Journal and Washington Times editors demanding that they stop referring to Obama's complete and utter lack of experience and his association with unrepentant domestic terrorists as "relevant".
9. Thatching a new straw roof for Barack's brother George in Kenya.
10. Being forced to debate the meaning of "is" with Joe Biden.
Wait...did we say threat of torture?
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